How do you change your life without being hit by a bus?

Do we as humans have to go though a life-threatening condition to change our life to the better, to start to live the life that we really want? Do you have to wait to be hit by a bus in order to do something about the way you live your life? The bus that 'hit' me was metaphorical, (needing a kidney transplant), but to rediscover your sparkle you don't have to go through what I did.

I have been looking into this for some years now. It can certainly help to be "hit by a bus", but I believe that no, you don't have to be faced with death or destruction to change your life. Also, just because you have gone through a difficult time and came out ok, doesn't automatically mean that you will live your life differently.

I think the reason that we want to change something in our lives, or even change our life, is that we want to change the way we feel. We might want to feel happier, healthier, more energised, have more love and passion, the list can go on and on. Here's what you can do – no buses involved!

Sorting out your relationships without actually doing it

One of the struggles that we have as humans is that we have unresolved underlying issues with people, especially with loved ones. What will help you to move on, to feel better, to live the life that you want and to feel healthy, is to sort these relationships out. I'm not saying it's going to be easy, and I'm not saying that because you working on sorting them out everything is going to be hunky dory with these people for the rest of your life. They might not even be ready to do this yet.

I'm sure that you have heard this question before, if you have, here we go again. If you knew that you had one day left to live on this planet, and if you wanted to leave this earth feeling complete with all your relationships, said everything that you want to say to people:

• What would you say?
• How would it make you feel?

Do this as an inventory - as a clean-up check list, or even a de-clutter list of your unfinished businesses with people. Write it down on paper, or record it or do something that suits you. If you feel it's too much for you to do on an emotional level, remember that you don’t have to do anything about it, it's just your opportunity to think through, making an inventory of your "stuff" that is holding your back in life especially holding back who you truly are, the true you.

What's next?

Now – here is the thing, you might think "ok – what do I have to do now"? Of course you could start to contact the people that you have on your list and say what it is that you really want to say to them, it's a really powerful way to get closer to the true you. But I know from my own experience that it might be very difficult to do, you might not feel that you can do it…yet…

Here is what to do. You start to work on the step before "this might be your last day on this planet action".

Decide what is the one thing that you can do for you that will bring you closer to yourself. It could be something like, "Every morning I'll do a 3-breath exercise to be in stillness", or something else that you feel will make you feel better about yourself, and frankly your life.

Be careful here, not to promise yourself something that is too big for you to do at the moment, like I'm going to go to the Gym 3 times a week from now on.

This action to decide what is the one thing that you can do for you, will really help you to get closer to the true you, and when you are ready, you will speak to the people that you know that you have some unresolved businesses with.